Just over a year ago I took a road trip before beginning a much longer journey. That longer journey is about to hit a major milestone: the transition from PA-S1 (Physician Assistant-Student 1st year) to PA-S2. The only thing standing in the way is a comprehensive exam this coming Wednesday.

I’m sitting here in my pajamas and in the middle of mixed emotions.

I’m excited to be almost done with my first year. I’m thrilled I did as well as I did. I’ve mentioned in the past that my undergrad GPA wasn’t very good. I’ve said that I’m proof that one could graduate in the bottom 10% of ones class and still be successful. And I like to think I’ve been successful in IT for the past 3 decades. And yet, I’ve still felt a bit of shame over that GPA. And I had been convinced for decades that it meant I’d never be able to get a Master’s degree. Even after getting into PA school, I had some doubts. I still feel that while undergraduate GPA can often be a predictor of ones success in grad school immediately after getting an undergraduate degree, I was pretty confident that it didn’t fully define me 3 decades later. However, convincing most schools of that is impossible. I’ve mentioned in the past that the vast majority of PA schools have an absolute cut-off at 3.0. This ruled out a number of schools for me. So I was grateful when Arcadia took a chance on me. So I’ve spent much of the past year proving to myself I was better than my undergrad days and showing Arcadia, that they had made the right choice.

And now my GPA (I’m still waiting for a few minor adjustments) shows I was right in thinking I could do better and proves they were right to give me a chance an

But I also feel a bit lost right now. While I need to and will study for that comprehensive, the pressure is mostly off. Today feels a bit weird. For the first time in about a year, I’m not worried about my next grade.

And I’m aquiver with anticipation. I start my first clinical rotation in about a month. That’s a whole new thing. I’m feeling pretty confident about it, but it will be a very different experience with different grading criteria.

I’m also feeling a bit bittersweet. Because my first rotation will be remote, I will be leaving my apartment for possibly the last time on Wednesday. It seems weird to have basically setup a home here for nearly a year. It’s not much and not a place I’d want to live forever, but it’s still been a home to me. So there’s that.

So here I am. Year One of PA school basically over and my emotions are all over the place.

But I’m sitting here with a smile. I’ve made it this far. I’m one step closer to becoming a PA.