Category Archives: NCRC

The Changing Size of the World

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I was reflecting earlier how the size of my “world” has changed over time.

When I was an infant, I didn’t know of a world beyond my crib. But as I got older, the world got bigger. While I have memories of going between Storrs and Falls Village CT, I think my first realization of a bigger world was when I followed some older boys in the housing complex in Storrs and ended up lost (I suspect they probably ditched me since who wants the 4yo following them around and ruining your fun when you’re 8 years old.) That ended up with a happy ending as a stranger found me and quite literally drove around asking if I recognized my apartment building. Apparently I did. I can’t imagine that scenario playing out today. That said, well before I can remember, my parents did do a trial move to California, but I don’t count that in my awareness, though I have a vague memory of me brushing my teeth while sitting on the tailgate of the Scout which I suspect was from one of the early road trips my dad and mom did.

When I was a bit older, I recall going to New York City with my parents and being confused because somehow I had gotten the idea that a city was bigger than a state and couldn’t figure out how New York City could be IN New York State. But even then, my world consisted mostly of trips to New Haven, CT to see my paternal grandparents and Bennington VT to see my maternal ones. And then there was the occasional trip to Boston to see my aunt and uncle (technically half-aunt, but there was never anything half about Aunt Sue).

At one point, I want to say when I was seven or so, I know I did a trip with my parents to Cape Code and to Bar Harbor ME. My world was getting bigger.

A few years later, a very different trip to Bar Harbor and then the Cape. That ended well but didn’t start so well.

Then a few years after that my world jumped in size. My dad and his then girlfriend and her daughter (four years my junior) and I travelled first to the Grand Canyon and Havasu Canyon. Suddenly I was outside the comfort of the northeast. And I loved it.

There were a few trips to Florida in there too, including my first time flying alone.

A few years after that I went to St. Croix USVI with my dad. My first long flight over water.

Years later I accompanied my paternal grandmother (my grandfather having passed on years previously) to the UK for my cousin’s wedding. Again, my world had expanded.

The NCRC has also helped expand my world due to having training all over the country.

And over the years, including this one, I have been back to the Grand Canyon three times since and have with the family seen much of the west coast, the Rockies and more.

And pre-Covid, the family and I visited the UK, France, and Belgium. My world continued to grow.

Going forward, I’m sure I’ll see more of the world.

And yet, in some ways, my world has shrunk and for a sad reason.

Other than a couple of brief trips to or through, I haven’t been to New Haven since my grandmother’s memorial.

I still go to Bennington, because my mom is there, but even then there’s a bit I don’t go to, my grandparent’s house. It’s no longer in the family since they’ve passed.

I’ll go to Boston again, but not as frequently since my aunt has died.

And I have yet to go back to Falls Village, ever since my closing out my dad’s estate. That one is just too hard, even years later.

You’ll note there’s a theme to the places I’m less likely to visit. And it’s one that I expect to become more common as I age.

So the world is bigger than ever and I’m still exploring it (as my spring road trip shows) but ironically in some ways, it’s grown a bit smaller. And that saddens me.

And so it goes.

F’ Cancer

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This year I’ve lost two people close to me. Both died of cancer. Their deaths have hit me in different ways. Both were linked to each other and to me through caving.

I obliquely referred to the first in a post earlier this year. Don Paquette was a friend, colleague and mentor. His intensity could easily fill a room. As an instructor, he was quick to let you know where you stood. I know some thought he might be overly harsh or strict or that he might have unreasonable standards. But the truth is, he simply wanted everyone to try their best. He didn’t necessarily expect everyone to be perfect in the skills taught. But if he thought you could do better, he’d push you to do so. And deep down, he cared.

Don was known for judging how well students would lay out the gear cache during training. He felt strongly that a well laid out gear cache was a key part of a well-run and organized rescue. In the last few years of his life, when he couldn’t make it to training, I’d text him a photo of a cache and wait for his grade so I could report back to students.

Don might give this a B on a good day

He also was an advocate of what some might call a “Command Voice”. A command voice was more than simply being louder than the rest, it was a tone that caught your attention, made you listen, and moreover, want to to do what was asked.

And that’s where Cordelia Ross enters the picture, or Cordie as we all knew her. I first recall meeting Cordie at the NCRC weeklong in Indiana in 2009. I was helping to teach the Level 2 class, along with Don, while Cordie was taking it. During much of the week, Don kept encouraging Cordie to be a bit louder and more commanding. This wasn’t exactly Cordie’s style however.

Cordie is on the left

We were doing an exercise in Sullivan Cave. The students weren’t quite as organized as they could have been, but as one of the goals of Level 2 is to teach leadership, we as instructors were sitting back letting things unfold to see how the students would cope and if they’d organize themselves.

And then it happened. From the top of the breakdown pile we heard a loud and commanding voice: “Stop!” Everyone, and I mean everyone, including the instructors, stopped what they were doing and waited for instructions to come forth. I recall looking up at Cordie who then, in a much quieter but forceful tone started to direct her fellow students on what to do next. It took us instructors a second to realize that she wasn’t giving us commands. But her voice had been so commanding for an instant, had she given us instructions, we would have no doubt followed them. We liked to joke that Cordie had found her command voice. But she made it clear, she hadn’t found it, she simply had used the one she had had all along, but held in reserve until the right time. I tend to think she was right. After that Don never again gave her any flack about her lack of command voice.

That episode with Cordie really personified her to me. She was a petite woman, often surrounded by firefighters and cavers twice her size. But she was the mouse that could roar. Many might describe her as quiet, but that wasn’t true. When she did speak, it was with authenticity and power. Many might underestimate her, but never more than once.

In my final visit with Don, we talked about many things, including our times instructing fellow cavers. He reminded me of a time where we played a prank on a set of students on a haul team. He had a deep sense of humor. His death was tough and I grieved and still grieve for him, but also know that having lived into his 70s he had lived a good life. He had seen his kids grown and even watched his grandkids grow up. We often talked about his travels with his family on Amtrak. While I know he would have loved to live longer and had more to do, he expressed no regrets to me. He led a good life.

Cordie’s death though strikes a deeper chord. Her family was just starting. Just over a year ago she had given birth to her daughter, Viola. Her cancer diagnosis was a surprise and sadly didn’t give her enough time in this world. Her husband Wayne now has the unenviable task of being what some might call a “single father”. Technically that may be true, but I know there is a whole community out there that will help him. And much of that community will help Viola know the woman who was her mother. Whereas Don had much to look back on, Cordie had so much to look forward to. Cordie looked forward to being a mother and I suspect far down the road, a grandmother. She had so much she wished to teach Viola. And Viola, sadly will never grow up truly knowing her mother. The world is a smaller place because of Cordie’s untimely death.

Whereas Don and I talked Amtrak and travels, Cordie and I discussed New England (because she had gone to school at Dartmouth) and literature. Both were people to whom I had a connection far more than simply caving or cave rescue. Both are people that I dearly wish I could sit down with at least one more time and talk to.

Both I will miss but in different ways.

And for both, I say fuck cancer.

2023 A Year in Review

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Well, it’s that time to look back on the year and see how I made progress on my goals for 2023.

  • It was a mixed bag. For one thing, I was looking to up my patient contact hours to hit the minimum required to apply to my programs. I hit 1000+ hours by the end of April. I’m now at over 2500 hours and closing in on 3000 hours. (For those doing the math, yes, that’s over 2200 hours this year alone. That’s on top of my IT work and taking classes!) The nice thing about these numbers is they put me above the average for all the programs I’m applying for.
  • And yes, I said applying for. While a goal for 2023 was to get accepted into a PA program, it didn’t happen. I will admit it’s been discouraging. It became even more discouraging to learn, via email, that one of the programs I had the most hope for, despite not having an official minimum GPA, hasn’t accepted anyone below a 3.2 GPA in the last 5 years. I’m not irked so much about that number, but as much about how they market the fact that they don’t have a minimum when effectively they do. Oh well. Now the good news is, I did get wait-listed at one program. We’ll see how that progresses. I’m undecided on if I’ll actually attend if I move from wait-list to accepted. And there’s at least one long-shot of a program I have yet to hear from. So we’ll see.
  • But, I will be applying to a number of the programs again this year. I’ll have a stronger resume in a number of ways, so I’m more hopeful. But I’ll be honest, if I don’t get accepted this year, I may explore other options in my life. If I were 5 or 10 years younger I might consider a lot more rounds and work more on my GPA, but the truth is, I’m not as young as I might like to be.
  • That said, I did get a lot of classes in over the year, including the microbiology class I needed. This was sort of a freebie. My employer, Albany Medical Center, offers this free to its employees over the summer, so I took it then. It was actually a lot of fun and I have to admit, I was a bit surprised to learn how much had changed since I took it 30+ years ago. Science really has marched on.
  • In addition, this fall I took Genetics. Not many programs required it, but one or two did and I figured I’d add it to my transcript. I’m glad I did. While the mechanics of the class was a bit frustrating at times (all virtual, some lectures had no videos, only PowerPoints), it was really interesting and I learned a LOT.
  • For my NCRC work, we will be hosting the 2024 National Weeklong here in NYS and I’m the site coordinator, so I’ll be getting busier and busier as June approaches. Interest has been great. We filled all the available class slots in 25 hours and as of today have 13 waitlisted for Level 1 and several each for Level 2 and Level 3. And as for TOTS, our medical focused class, I think we have a curriculum and will be asking for approval to do a trial teaching of it this year. So that’s all coming together!
  • I mentioned continuing to blog, but the truth is, I didn’t blog as much as I used to. Between needing sleep (see above about working, school, and more) and not having much to say, I just didn’t blog much this year. Oh well.
  • Reading: Honestly, I dropped the ball on this. I expect to continue to do so. I did reread Echo Heron’s book, Intensive Care: The Story of a Nurse. I recommend picking up a copy.
  • My goal of speaking once this year didn’t come to fruition. I was hoping to be picked to speak at Pass Summit about how to do a career change, but wasn’t accepted. Oh well.
  • I can’t say I saw more of my friends, but I did see a number. I also worked on schedule changes, twice now, so that should free up more time. So time won’t be a huge issue, but money will as I’ll be being frugal to save up money for PA School. But hey, let’s get together!
  • Septic System: well we got the design approved (that only cost around $10K!) but didn’t get it in this year. We’re hoping to get the quotes and get it started as soon as Spring comes.
  • Hiking, Biking, Caving – I did far less than I’d have liked. That’s all I’ll say for now. I will add though that I’m feeling a bit older and my body reminds me of it.

One thing that was NOT on my list of things to do, but happened anyway, was serving on a Grand Jury. On top of serving, I was also the jury foreperson. This was quite an experience. I saw a lot about how the justice system works and as foreperson I got to swear folks in (which I’ll admit, is kind of cool) and also review the final paperwork before it was sent to the judge.

So, that’s my year in review. Stick around until tomorrow and I’ll see what my goals for 2024 are. Hint, a few of them are listed above already!

And thanks for everyone who was with my on this journey through this crazy thing we call life.

Still Running

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Last week I wrote about my PA School application process and the CASPA site used to apply. Since I wrote that, I’ve made more progress. I am technically at the point where I could hit “send” on 8 applications. But I haven’t. Yet.

And it’s a good thing! Since this is so important, I wanted to make sure I had others proof-read some of my submissions and comment on them. So first a call out to my wife Randi who gave me some good feedback on the general tone. One of my concerns was my general essay. The general essay answers the question: Please explain why you are interested in being a Physician Assistant.

I had written two versions and felt my second one was much stronger, she agreed. The best way I can describe my first one was that it was very pedestrian. The second one I think far better reflects why at this point in my life I want to be a PA. I think I’ve said it before, but in case I haven’t, I will here: To make a difference. Yes, I suspect everyone wants that, but after 30+ years of basically pushing data, I want to have a direct impact on people’s lives. The more I think about it, the more I realize how much it motivates me. It’s one reason I work with the NCRC and teach cave rescue (and perform cave rescues). It’s a direct impact. It’s a reason why I like teaching. Even now, before I’m a PA, every shift in the ED I know I’m making a difference. It might be getting a cold patient a blanket or assisting in a trauma, but I know at the end of every shift, I’ve made a difference.

The second call out is to my friend Alma. I’ve relied on her for years (I won’t say how long as that might give insight into how old we both are) for her editing prowess. I’m thankful I did so since she caught a number of minor typos, but also a major one that at best would have elicited some laugh, at worst, doomed me. I had meant to say underserved communities, but had written undeserving communities. Quite the difference!

So, does that mean I’ll hit submit today to those 8 schools?

Not quite. I have to reload my edits and then still review the submissions and decide if I really want to apply to those 8 or just a subset. In any case though, come this weekend I think I’ll be hitting submit and I’ll admit I’m excited.

2023 A Year in Preview

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Another quick post because another day where I have to be in the ED acting as a tech.

As I mentioned yesterday, I need a minimum of 1000 hours of patient contact time to apply to most of the PA schools I want to apply to. I’m literally hours short of 1/3rd of that. I’ll pass the 1/3rd mark today. This is just over 2 months. I’m confident I’ll make the deadline and add many hours to spare.

  • So that’s goal 1. Getting enough patient contact hours to apply to PA school. I’m well on my way!
  • Next, is finish my academic prereqs. I had to add a class to my list. I had taken Microbiology as an elective for my undergrad. In fact, it was my final exam of my undergrad career. However, to save money (since I was paying for this class out of pocket) I elected not to pay for the lab. Well, the professor made it clear he expected us to show up for lab anyway. So, I’ve done Microbiology, including the lab, but the transcript doesn’t show the lab portion and I need that. So I’ll retake micro. I’m OK with that. It was a fun class after all.
  • I’ll definitely keep working on my TOTS class I want to present at the NCRC. We’ll see how that goes.
  • Continue Blogging: I’ll continue my switchover from a focus on SQL and IT related posts to PA/ED Tech type posts.
  • Biking: We’ll see how my schedule works. Perhaps only 600 miles this year, not 700 as a goal. Ironically, one benefit I get at work is a secure bike storage area. Sadly, my shifts end at 11:30 PM so I don’t think I’ll be biking home much, so it means I won’t be biking to work much!
  • Hiking: Since my schedule is every other weekend on, it also means every other weekend off. I hope to squeeze in some hiking.
  • In fact: I expect to slowly wind down my IT work over the coming year so I can focus on applying to PA School and focus on other skills. Honestly, two big reasons I’m continuing my IT work is that it pays much better which helps since I’ll need the money for PA school and other expenses over the next few years (goal is to avoid as much debt as possible) and also because I do have some commitments to existing customers I want to fulfill.
  • Read more: I’ve found myself for a variety of reasons reading less in the past two years than I’d like. So I resolve to get books off my reading list. Right now I’m reading American Sirens, which is basically a history of how the paramedic service started in the US. I highly recommend it.
  • Speak at least once in the coming year. I’ve got a great talk in mind. But I won’t drop hints just yet.
  • Get Accepted into PA school. This of course is the big one. It’s what I’ve been working towards for the past 12 months. I’m confident that with my background and the experience I’m gaining I’ll get in someplace. It’s just a matter of where and what if any aid they’ll add.
  • See friends: Again, with that every other weekend off, I’m hoping to travel to see more friends. (That said, my schedule currently has me working every Friday, which I’m hoping to change so I can ensure a 3 day weekend.)
  • Get our new septic system in. Yeah, I didn’t mention it before, but the old one has basically failed (though not horribly so) so it’s time.

Finally, I realized I should have done this yesterday, but I want to thank EVERYONE who has given me encouragement and support in the past year. It’s meant a LOT. From blood family, to #SQLFamily, and NCRC family and others, I’ve had more than a fair share of folks say they believe in me and support me. It’s given me a lot of confidence. Thank you.

And with that, now time to shower, get into my scrubs and head back into the mix.

2022 in Review

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It’s that time of a year again to look back. This will probably be a shorter post than I might want to write, but that is in part because of the good things that did happen this year.

First a link back to my preview I wrote on the first of this year.

  • I had said I was going to keep writing for Red-Gate. Turns out, that didn’t happen. Too many other things were going on to really write any articles. I did keep my Friends of Red-Gate status and helped talk my largest client into adopting many of their tools.
  • I talked about premiering a new NCRC class called “Tip of the Spear” (TOTS) for medical folks. Again, this didn’t happen and probably won’t for 2023, but the team and I are making progress and I hope to make more this week on developing the curriculum.
  • Continue Blogging: this I definitely did. I may have missed a Tuesday or two, but I also had some extra posts, so I think I probably hit 52 in the year anyway.
  • Travel: Other than 2 trips to Washington DC to see friends, nothing really happened here.
  • Biking: I had hoped to break 700 miles again this year. I’m 38 miles short. And ironically most of that is because I was 33 miles short of my goal in September. That said, I did buy a new bicycle, so I’m excited about that.
  • Hiking: definitely didn’t happen.
  • Caving: I did get in a few new caves thanks to the Week-Long cave rescue class in Clifton Forge, Virginia, but I didn’t get into any new ones locally. I’ll call that a win.

So on one hand, it may sound like I didn’t manage to reach a majority of my goals, but the reality is, it’s been a very successful year. As noted in the post at the start of the year, my primary goal was preparing to apply for PA School. I had given some initial thought to completely all my requirements so I could apply sometimes in the 3rd quarter of the year for entry in January of 2023 for completion in 2025. After some thought, I realized that just wasn’t practical, so I reset my goals a bit. My plan is to apply to several in 2023 for entry in 2024 and completion in 2026. It’s a far more realistic goal.

So, in January I started with 3 classes a the local community college:

  • A&P I – one of my favorites. I love learning how the human body works
  • General Psychology – an interesting class and the professor was good, but psych isn’t my future
  • Biology I – two different professors, one for lecture, one for lab.

I’m proud to say that I got As in all of them. I felt like I was off to a good start. My undergrad grades weren’t great, so I need some wins here.

Over the summer I took an accelerated version of Organic Chemistry that I wrote about several times. I had hoped to eek out at least a C, given the horror stories I heard while at RPI. And honestly, in some ways it was one of the hardest classes academically I’ve ever taken. But, the professor was great and I learned a lot and managed to get an A.

For the fall I slowed down a bit and only look A&P II and Biology II. The tread of keeping my 4.0 continued. It does help that both classes sort of build on each other.

But the biggest change, and consumer of time was finally getting a position as an Emergency Department Technician. For the primary school I plan on applying to, I need at least 1000 hours of “patient contact time”. I had delayed applying long enough that I was starting to get nervous I might not get a good enough job in time. But, as they say, fortune favors the bold, and I got fortunate here. The first seven weeks were spent in orientation. Since then I’m a full-fledged “Blue Badge” tech and I’m working on getting my “Red Badge” so I can be a lead tech on Level 1 and 2 traumas. I’ll write about that more in the future.

One advantage of being out of orientation is I can pick up extra hours (at a higher rate which is nice). And so, after just over 2 months of effort, I’m at over 30% (i.e. over 300 hours) of the way towards my goal of 1000 hours. I fully expect to far exceed that 1000 hour metric long before the application deadline. And in fact, will be 1.2% closer by midnight tonight. And that’s why I can’t a better blog today. Time to jump in the shower and head to work. This will be my 2nd of 3 12 hours shifts in a row (my schedule for now is a 12 hour shift every Friday and then every other weekend (giving me 24 hours a week). But I also picked up a bunch of work earlier this week so I’m well over 40 for the week. Right now, I’m getting hours when I can. And so with that, I’m off.

SQLBits – My Thoughts

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Many weeks I struggle with what I plan on writing about, but this post came to me last Thursday or Friday. It was clear to me that I should write about 2022 SQLBits.

Now, the more astute of you are probably thinking, “But Greg, you weren’t there. How can you write about it?”

Well you’re right. I’m not going to write about my experience attending it. Rather I’m going to write about my experience not attending it.

I had applied to speak at SQLBits, but didn’t make the cut this year. That happens. But this time there was more than mixed feelings. Had I been selected, I almost certainly would have tried to find a way to do so in person. However, as many of my readers know, I’m back in school taking classes as prereqs to get into PA school. And frankly, I’m loving it. But it is taking time and focus. This week, March 14-18 is Spring break for my fellow students. But last week I did have classes and I’m not sure I could have taken the time off to fly to the UK. And I’m not sure I would have wanted to; if only because of missing my A&P I lab this week (learning about the bones of the head and spine, including the axis and atlas (C1, C2 vertebrae).

So in a sense, I’m almost grateful that I wasn’t chosen to speak. It solved me the pain of trying to solve the dilemma of do I attend in person or not?

But dang, did I miss people. I saw posts from so many of my #SQLFamily that I was sad I couldn’t see them in person. And then, looking at the calendar, it dawned on me, I’m not entirely sure I can make the PASS Summit this year, again due to classes.

It just drove home how much so many of you have become family and how much I miss so many of you. And in some ways its just the start. As my plans continue, I’ll find myself making the slow transition from the #SQLFamily to hopefully a #PAFamily or whatever community I find there. And while I have often found myself in many communities, for example besides #SQLFamily I’m also heavily involved with the NCRC and plan on continuing my efforts there, I know over time my active involvement in #SQLFamily will slowly diminish. That said, I’m not walking away just yet and will continue to be involved as much as I can, both in presenting when I can and in running my local user group.

But that said, I miss you all. And do look forward to seeing any of you when I can.

The Dream

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The dream is always the same. … and I… find myself in a room full of kids taking their college boards. I’m over three hours late; I’ve got two minutes to take the whole test. I’ve… just made a terrible mistake. I’ll never get to college. My life is ruined. – Risky Business

Today is the day. For the first time in over 30 years I’ll be sitting down in a college classroom and taking a class. I distinctly recall taking my final exam for college. It was in Microbiology. I wasn’t overly concerned. I need to get something like a 40% on it to pass the class (and since it was counting as transfer credit, my actual letter grade didn’t matter as far as RPI was concerned.). It was multiple choice. Once I was confident I had gotten well over 40% I put down the pen and walked out. (For the record I ended up well over 80% on the exam.)

But I have to remind myself, that technically while that was the end of my undergrad career, I have taken classes since then. I took a class on SQL Server a few years later, I studied for and got my MCSE a few years after that, and starting in 2002, I started my career with the NCRC where I have since become an instructor.

But, this is different. For one, it’s 12 weeks of classes. There will be a lab. There will be homework. It’ll be harder in its own way than the other training.

Like many, for years after I graduated, I’d have a dream, usually around May, where it was exam time and I realized there was a class I had never attended and now had to take an exam in it. I’d always wake up a bit upset. One year though finally the dream changed. This time the setup was the same, but when I went to take the final exam, I aced it. Don’t ask me how. But I literally stopped having these exam dreams after that.

So I figure it’s appropriate that I had a dream about starting school last night. In my dream though, I was over in Schenectady (about 15 miles from the community college I’ll be taking classes at) trying to get folks to tell me what time it was, since I had to be at class at 2:00 PM. None would give me a straight answer at first until I got upset. Finally one person told me it was 1:45 PM. I was panicking because I knew there would be no way I’d make it to the Torrington CT Campus of UConn. It was then that I recalled that fortunately I didn’t have to drive that far.

All this is a setup to admit that yes, I am actually both excited and nervous. I’ve gone in a few short weeks from a feeling of ennui when it came to my career and life to one of stress and even a slight bit of panic. Of course it didn’t help that I had to get my vaccination status cleared, and then a bunch of other paperwork finished up late yesterday before it all became official.

I honestly have very little idea what my experiences over the next several years will be like. But I’m looking forward to them.

And more in the future.

2022 in Preview

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I started last year’s version of this post with the suggestion I should leave it as a blank page and I’m tempted again, but no, I actually have goals for next year.

By words, thoughts become actions, and by actions words become deeds.

I’m going to start with the usual list of items and then have a big reveal at the bottom (you can skip to that if you want).

  • Like last year, I’m going to continue to write for Red-Gate. Even if it’s just one article. I will also attempt to keep my “Friends of Red-Gate’ status. In fact, I vow to be even more involved if I can find time.
  • This year for the NCRC, I’m looking to premiere a new class we’re calling “Tip of the Spear” aka TOTS. The focus of the class will be to work with medical doctors, nurses, physicians assistants and other medically trained personal to get them (the tip of the spear) to the patient deep in the cave as quickly as possible to provide the best possible medical care. Unlike our normal classes where there’s a strong focus on things like setting up communications, rigging, searching, etc this will focus solely on getting them there to use their skills. I’m excited about this, even though there’s a fair amount of work required to fully develop the curriculum.
  • Yeah, I’ll continue blogging. ‘Nough said. (Hey no one says you have to read it!)
  • Travel: While I do plan to do more, the big trips may be out for reasons to be mentioned below. But we’ll see.
  • Biking: Yeah, I hope to hit at least 700 miles this year (that has sort of been my minimum goal for years and I’ve beat it every year. I’ll continue to do so).
  • Hike More: I hope to do at least one overnight this year. And of course day hikes. So if you’re interested in doing a hike, let me know.
  • Caving: There’s a few caves I want to get into this year. So I’m looking forward to that.

Changes are Coming!

And now “the big reveal”. I’m going to start by saying that while I enjoy consulting and I think I’m pretty good at it, I am not enjoying it as much as I used to. I’m also simply not finding it fulfilling in a way I’d like it to be.

Among the reasons is that at the end of the day I look at what I’ve done and wonder “what difference does it really make?” Yes, I’ve written some solid code. I’ve helped with projects that have saved my clients thousands of dollars or made them tens of thousands. Financially, they’ve obviously made a difference. But, on a personal level they haven’t.

One reason I’ve enjoyed teaching cave rescue so much (and participating in the few I have, including a body recovery) is because at the end of the day I know I’ve made a difference: I’ve taught someone valuable skills, helped someone get out safely, or even in the most extreme case, been able to help others find closure.

I’ve been contemplating a change for awhile. I had toyed with a few ideas, such as going back to being a full-time employee, ideally in a management position for awhile. And I may still end up doing that, but that’s not where I am planning on heading right now. Financially it would probably be the right move, and honestly, I think when I’ve had the right environment, I’ve been a good manager (on the flip side, in a bad environment I’ve found it hard to be an effective or good manager).

So, instead, I’m going to pivot a bit and attempt a career change. I’m going to to try to move into a field where I think I can make a direct impact on people’s lives. I’m going to start taking prerequisite classes so I can apply for a Physician’s Assistant program. This is an idea I’ve toyed with off and on for years. Or rather one of several. Besides enjoying working with computers, I’ve been fascinated with two other fields: medical and law. I’ve thought for quite a few years if perhaps I should explore them. This really came to a head during my dad’s fatal illness 6 years ago. I’ll brag a bit and say that more than once I had one of the attendings or nurses ask me (after discussing his condition or treatment) “Are you in the medical field?” Once even when students were rounding, the attending asked them a question and none answered it to his satisfaction, I was able to step in and correctly answer it. Yes, one or two students scowled at me.

Now, having said that, I’m quite realistic in understanding that while I do claim a greater than a laymen’s knowledge of things medical, I have a LONG way to go and I’m entering a difficult field later in life and have a bit of catchup to do. I have no illusions that this will be easy for me. But to perhaps channel a bit of John F. Kennedy “We choose to go to the Moon in this decade and do the other things, not because they are easy, but because they are hard…”

In the most optimistic timeframe, I’ll be completing my PA work in mid 2025. In a more realistic timeframe, probably 2026. This is a serious investment of time and effort. This is arguably going to be one of the hardest things I’ve done in years. There’s no guarantee of success (heck, there’s no guarantee that even after doing all the prereqs I’ll be accepted into a program). But, I’ve decided I have to try. Ah but a man’s reach should exceed his grasp, Or what’s a heaven for? I won’t know if I can do it unless I try and I don’t want to be a 4 years older wondering “what if?”

I’d been having thoughts about this for a long time. I finally put the thoughts into words, which made them that much more real. Now I’m starting to put the words into actions.

And one of those actions is to write the words down here for others to read. I do this for a multitude of reasons.

  • By writing this down and revealing it to the world (or at least to a small part of it) it holds me a bit more accountable for trying.
  • I’ll freely admit, I could use any and all support and help any of my friends, family, including #sqlfamily, and others are willing to give.
  • And honestly, perhaps it’ll inspire others in a similar position to stretch for their own goals.

For the coming year

I’ll keep working in SQL, you’ll see me at events and I’ll probably do some speaking, but I won’t be seeking out new work. I simply won’t have the time.

I’ll still keep running my local user group and looking for speakers

I’ll be blogging about my successes, and failures.

And I’ll be busy.

Wish me luck.

Changes

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Let’s start with what I’m not doing this week: teaching cave rescue. As I wrote two weeks ago, those of us in charge of annual upcoming National Cave Rescue training class decided to cancel it in light of the ongoing Covid pandemic. Of course over the weekend, on Facebook popped up images of the modular version of the Level 1 class I taught last year (because the National planned for June of 2020 had ben postponed due to Covid). This got me thinking about the numbers. Using the site 91-Dovic I was able to compare the infection rate year to year, and let’s just say it’s shocking. In New York State, the infection rate was roughly 3 people per 1000. Currently it’s hovering around 23 people per 1000. And this is with a high rate of vaccination. National numbers are similar in terms of the ratio of numbers. Clearly, despite vaccinations we’ve got a long ways to go, but I feel more confident in our decision to cancel.

That said, there were of course other personal consequences. For one, I’m able to actually spend time with a client on a project that’s seriously backlogged. I won’t go into details, but suffice to say, only recently, with the addition of a very competent project manager has this project gotten on track. My role is sort of the middle-man whose scripts passes data between two systems. It’s a critical part of the process, though my development work is mostly done at this point. But had I been teaching this week, it would have created issues for the goals for the project. So, I guess the client wins out on this one.

But there were some other positive consequences. While I couldn’t go to my daughter’s college to drop her off on her first day (the school was limiting move-ins to the student and two others, so my wife and son went, he had never seen the campus) I was able to see her off that morning. Something that wouldn’t have been possible otherwise. (though, despite that, all four of us forgot to take the cookies I had baked out of the fridge and put them in the car!)

Heading off to college!

But also, it meant my wife and I were able to drive my son to his college for his last semester. (the plan to provide him with his own car hasn’t quite gone according to plan).

My son, with my wife, settling in to his new apartment

Looking back, I realize the last time I had gone to my son’s school was last May to take him out there so he could pack up his dorm room after the school went entirely virtual. At some point, while driving the New York Thruway something creepy struck me: how empty it was! Due to the ban on all non-essential travel and the reduction in consumption, there were far fewer vehicles of all sorts on the highway. On the way back, the truck stop we stopped at to get some gas at was basically empty. I think it was ourselves, and 2 other cars and just the person working the counter. It reminded me very much of the post-apocalyptic scenes you see in some movies!

These two drives also represent the furthest I’ve been from my house in about 18 months.

Also last week, my wife’s job finally went back to in-person. So in the space of a week, I’ve gone from a full house to an empty nest. It’s quiet here not. Too quiet.

In the past 18 months or so I’ve gone from semi-regular travel all over the country to not going more than 30 miles from my house (except for very rare occasions) and from not wearing a mask to wearing one almost all the time and now more recently, from a full house to a much emptier one. Let me just say, the cats aren’t overly social.

So changes… Some big. Some small, but they all add up.