What’s for Dinner?

“Food!” is my usual answer. Yes it’s my dad joke answer. I can’t help it.

The truth is, I generally don’t have a well planned menu in advance and sometimes what I plan on making for dinner will change after I step in the supermarket and something catches my eye. Sometimes I won’t even have an idea until I go into the supermarket. That said, I still have sort of a routine, one my family is familiar with and perhaps at times tired of. (That said, they still eat what I make, so I guess they’re not that tired of it).

  • Monday – Usually a chicken dish. Last night was Pad Thai (but I’ll let you in on a secret, the noodles were woefully underdone. I was afraid they’d turn to mush and took them out too early!)
  • Tuesday – Usually something centered around ground beef/turkey, tacos, sloppy joes or shaved steak for Philly Cheese steaks. I’m not sure about tonight’s dinner, but since I did tacos last week, I can guarantee it won’t be Taco Tuesday tonight. I don’t like repeats. 🙂
  • Wednesday – Up in the air. Sometimes a grilled sausage, onion and pepper on a bun.
  • Thursday – Often store bought ravioli or tortellini. They’re simple and quick.
  • Friday – I get more creative, often some crab cakes, maybe scallops, or something good.
  • Saturday – At least once a month, pizza with homemade crust (and occasionally homemade mozzarella).
  • Sunday – Take out. Previously 90%+ of the time it was Lee Lin, a Chinese food place I’ve been ordering from for decades (literally since college) but now we vary it up with other take out places.

So yeah If you happen to show up at my house (post-pandemic please) you’ve got an idea of what you’ll end up with depending on what night you show up. Maybe. I might change my mind.

I really enjoy cooking. I love the idea of creation and the idea of nourishing body and soul. I like the fact that food can bring joy to people.

During the time of Covid, there have been times when cooking has been a real drudgery, but other times I’ve really enjoyed it or had the chance to try new things. For example, like many Americans I’ve dabbled with making Sourdough.

Image is of  full loaf (on the left) and a half loaf of homemade sourdough bread.
Fresh Sourdough, an early attempt.
A roast beef sandwich with lettuce and tomato and mayo on a plate. In the background is a keyboard.
Roast Beef Sandwich with homemade sourdough bread!

Of course I mentioned pizzas?

An image of two pizzas from above, resting on a butcher block.
The one on the left is a pepperoni pizza. The one on the right is a white pizza with sundried tomatoes. 
Both have fresh basil from my garden on them.
Two sourdough pizzas with home grown herbs.
Image of two pizzas looking from above. On top of a butcher block.
Top one has fried onions, Granny Smith apple, bacon, sundried tomatoes.

Bottom one is white pizza with home made pesto.
Two more: the top is bacon, sundried tomato, Granny Smith Apple, fried onions! The bottom a white pizza with homemade pesto and some sundried tomatoes
“Breakfast Pizza” with cheddar cheese, bacon, black pepper and a pair of eggs cracked on top near the end.

For Thanksgiving I tried something new:

An experiment for Thanksgiving dessert - apple sharlotka. It was a success!
An experiment for Thanksgiving dessert – apple sharlotka. It was a success!

And of course one has to have sweets!

Gingersnap cookies
LOTS of sugar and carbs!
Bags of Christmas Cheer
A smattering of gingerbread men!
A smattering of gingerbread men!

But of course, the question is “what’s for dinner?

My French-Canadian grandmother’s recipe for baked kibbeh taught to her by her Lebanese mother-in-law. BTW, this is 1/2 the amount she’d normally make for family gatherings! This is over 3 lbs of meat plus bulgur wheat and onions! It’s a LOT of food and oh so delicious.
I actually bought my air fryer BEFORE the pandemic, but love it and use it a lot and find it makes great wings. (And the cinnamon cap has nothing to do with the wings.)
Air fried General Tso’s Chicken, finished in the pan. Thanks to #SQLFamily fellow DBA Rie Shewbart Merritt for the recipe!
Technically “Cottage Pie” because it’s made with beef instead of lamb, but still delicious, and one of Randi’s favorites!
A Friday dinner with steak and potato (and yes, I’m a heathen who likes a bit of ketchup with my steak, but that sauce is delicious too!)
Perogies that close family friend Christine Dzakowic Walsh had made, but fresh herbs from my garden.
Another Friday dinner. That’s my burger on the right, with the works, grilled onions, bacon, bleu cheese, lettuce, tomato, garlic-parm fries!
Can I interesting you in mini-beef wraps with mashed potatoes with a wine-sauce reduction? I think I got this one from close friend Sarah Lawrence.
Chorizo street tacos anyone?
Homemade Falafel and homemade hummus with a peanut sauce and veggies and homemade pita. I need to make this again soon I think.
Of course latkes are a must in this house come Hanukkah! (toss in some curry powder, trust me on that one!)
Homemade pasta with homemade pesto and Presto… delicious dinner!
My most recent experiment, homemade dumplings! Delicious but need some work!
Some homemade chili with yes.. sourdough bread!
Coquille St Jacques – delicious! My mom introduced me to this dish when I was about 10.

And besides dinner, there’s breakfast

French toast with lots of cinnamon!
Sourdough waffles with a variety of toppings (including homemade whipped cream!)
Sourdough pancakes!
Yes, I put ketchup on my eggs. Deal with it. And yes, that’s my initial. It’s my egg. I can do that!
My latest attempt at homemade bagels. I think I nailed it this time. More in the future!

Snacking is important too!

Homemade Pita (roll it very thing and place in a very hot oven!) with homemade Hummus!

Now, that’s not to say it’s all fun and games. Sometimes one does have to collect data on how to make things better. Recently I had been reading up on chocolate chip cookies (research of course) and learned that the original recipe called for letting the dough sit for 36 hours before baking. Now, I’m never one to take a detail like that at face value, so I had to of course experiment. I also decided to test the baking time for my white whole wheat chocolate chip cookies to see if 10 or 11 minutes was better.

Baked right after mixing
Baked after being chilled 24 hours
After being chilled 38 hours (I slept in that morning).

So, I think more research is necessary, but I would say that chilling does appear to help the flavor and I think initially 11 minute baking is better, but the next day, it’s hard to tell if it or the 10 minutes is better.

I probably have a dozen or so more pictures of various meals, but I think I’ll stop here. I’m getting hungry and it’s not even lunch time yet!

Seriously though, besides the biking and caving and other things to keep me busy, I’ve enjoyed cooking (most of the time) in the last year. I hope you enjoyed my trip through my kitchen in the last year. I’d love to see what you’ve been making or baking!

The Weather is Frightful

I’m writing this from upstate NY, outside of Albany, but from what I can tell, this post could be written almost anywhere in the US right now.

I’ll admit I didn’t sleep as well last night as I’d have liked. I kept waking up expecting to hear the beep of UPSs or other indications we’d lost power. About the only sound I heard was a snow plow go by once or twice.

We’re fine here. Most schools are on winter break as it is, but those which weren’t are closed for the day. Scattered power outages, but I suspect most will be back in a few hours. And it’s supposed to warm up into the 40s later today. I’m not too worried.

But, I’m looking at reports from caving and #sqlfamily friends and coworkers from across the country and it’s grim.

From one: I have about one bar left on my battery and no power.  

Just saw another: And then the power went out.

Another had a nice screen shot of her pool in Texas freezing over. I should point out, that’s COLD. Not just “oh it’s 31F cold” but much colder because generally a pool has quite a bit of latent heat in it and even though it’s just the surface freezing, it means that the heat in the water deeper in the pool can’t keep the surface warm.

I’m reading reports of rolling blackouts in Texas and portions of the Rocky Mountain states. For example, Texas hit a new record for a single day demand as everyone turned on any electric heating device they could find.

That said, even for everyone who survives this deep freeze (and let’s be honest and clear here, there are some who won’t. Most of us will never know their names, they’re the ones sleeping under a bridge overpass, living in a trailer on the edge of town without access to better resources, the person living in their car who can’t get to a shelter) the problems are just beginning.

There’s going to be a lot of folks reporting water damage due to burst pipes. There’s going to be a lot of car repairs for folks whose cars have been damaged or even totaled due to accidents.

And I highly suspect there’s going to be a marked increase in energy prices over the next few months. From what I understand, the largest refinery in the US shut down yesterday due to the weather. A number of well heads have frozen, and more. Now, this is not an apocalyptical catastrophe. Most will be up and running in the next few days, but such a disruption will cause ripple effects.

Combine that with the ongoing economic impact of COVID on jobs and the economy in general, let me just say Spring can’t come soon enough.

I’m fortunate and I know that. I’m warm. I have heat and electricity. I have plenty of food in the house and neither my wife nor I have lost work in the past year. But I think and worry about those not as fortunate. I’ve contributed more to charities this year than the past and expect to continue to do so. I’ll continue with my other charity work and continue to advocate for policies I think that will help others that need it.

But I still hope for Spring, both literally and figuratively.

Another Case for Diversity

I’ve spoken in the past about why I think diversity is important. For example, understanding genders helps us design better databases and interfaces. But this past weekend another argument for diversity was presented to me. I was reminded that experiences many of us take for granted are often experienced differently by other people.

I’ve spoken in the past that I’m a caver and I teach cave rescue. As a caver I’m a member of the National Speleological Society. This is a great group and it’s dedicated to cavers and those who have a personal or professional interest in caves. It recently added a section for diversity. Some of the discussion behind this occurred on Facebook and it was quite telling in the reaction.

Let me start with saying that cavers are some of the friendliest people I know. It’s far from unheard of for a caver to look in the NSS Members Manual or online and say “Hey, you don’t know me, but I’m passing through your area, can you hook me up with a local cave to visit and maybe some crash space” and it happens. So yes, cavers are quite open and hospitable.

That said the Facebook discussion was an example of many of my fellow cavers missing the mark. The one that stood out in my mind was “Of course people of color can come caving with us. They just need to ask. We never turn anyone away.” And that’s most likely true. But, there are problems there, including people of color knowing they can ask and who to ask and where.

One response I found particularly telling, was a person of color pointing out that in parts of the South, simply walking across a field to a cave was potentially unsafe to them. This was a concept the white cavers couldn’t wrap their mind around and even actively told the person his experience was wrong.

So in this area I do think it’s important for us to reach out to members of groups who might not traditionally cave and invite them to join us.

But, as I said, another reason was presented to me on the past Thursday night. The NSS Education and Diversity Committees had joined together to present a webinar by Beau D. Carroll on Cherokee Syllabary in caves in the Alabama area (the main focus was on Manitou Cave).

Now, I go caving because I think it’s cool, both literally and figuratively. Seeing how the rock changes as you move to different parts of the cave, or seeing formations, and all that is just really interesting. My experiences are shaped by that. I also enjoy taking beginners of all ages caving and seeing their reactions and their often growing enthusiasm. I can quite safely say I’ve literally taken 100s of people on their first caving trip and am proud to know that several have gone on to become great cavers, far outpacing my own experiences.

That’s my experience.

Beau talked a lot about the experiences he, as a member of the Eastern band of Cherokees experienced while exploring in Manitou Cave and other caves. For him, it was both a learning experience (he is working on a PhD in archeology) as he found and translated the Cherokee Syllabary writings in the cave and as a way to connect to his ancestors. To me, this was particularly fascinating for two reasons. The first is the history of the syllabary itself is fascinating. It was developed over a 12 year period by Sequoyah and within 5 years, it’s estimated over 90% of the tribe could read. It’s one of the few writing systems that was developed within recent memory and for which we have somewhat decent records of its development. The second reason is that the writing very much is recording the history of a people whose entire way of live was disrupted by the Trail of Tears. He’s unlocking history and we’re learning from it.

It’s also a very different way of experiencing the dark zone of a cave. It’s not just a matter of “oh this is cool” but “this is someone’s history and culture.” One example stands out to me.

At one point during the Q&A Beau talks about leaving offerings of tobacco for his ancestors inside a cave. I have to admit, initially this offended my sensibilities, especially in light of the NSS motto.

Take Nothing but Pictures, Leave Nothing but Footprints, Kill Nothing but Time

But it forced me to stop and think about my own prejudices. While it’s clear from other comments Beau makes that he and his Cherokee agree on much of the concept of cave preservation, am I right to be offended? Is my concept of “leave nothing but footprints” truly correct? For me, caving is not a spiritual experience, but for him it is. His experience is arguably as valid as mine and I think should be respected also.

In the end it made me realize that a strong reason for a diversity committee isn’t just to “bring others into the caving” but for us to realize how others experience caving. This is equally and perhaps in some ways more important. I don’t think we can truly understand caving until we understand how others experience it also.

I want to thank Bree Jameson for bringing the webinar to my attention and Devra Heyer, NSS Education Committee Chair and Leah Hill, NSS Outreach Chair and Ambassador for the Diversity Committee for putting this all together. It’s a great presentation.

Please, take an hour out of your day and listen and watch. It’s worth it!

Also, please not my latest Redgate Simple-Talk article is now online: PowerShell editors and environments part 1 is now online.

Guy’s it’s on Us

A short thread on Twitter yesterday prompted today’s blog. Dr. Jen Gunter (who I do not follow) mentioned her planned response to “I don’t have a question, it’s more of a comment.

One of the replies I thought completely missed the point and I tried to respond in a somewhat humorous but pointed way to the man replying. It took him about 9 hours, but he finally replied and I think based on his reply, completely missed my point. Oh well. I had tried.

But it got me thinking. Had I been blunt enough? Should I have been a bit more confrontational? Could *I* stand up at a conference and give Dr. Gunter’s pointed reply? And of course, the nagging question in the back of my head, “had I commented when I a question was the appropriate response?” or otherwise ended up “centering the discussion around me rather than the original person?”

Let me address the last first. I’m sure I have. I like to think “well I’m a friendly guy, I like to relate and show I’m relatable.” And that’s all true, but, that’s also part of the problem. It’s a case of recentering a discussion or something around me. I’ve always tried to be conscious of this since college when I took a class at the women’s college down the hill and realized that what I had heard about men dominating discussions was true. In a class of about 20 students, with just 3 men, one of the men (and no, it wasn’t me) clearly dominated the discussion.

Anyway, back to my response. I actually sometimes am jealous of some of my friends who can have “I have no fucks to give” attitude and will openly confront someone like that. I think sometimes that can be a good thing, especially with a more egregious example. And I’ve seen some that are pretty bad.

My attempt to deflect the one tweeter’s reply with a bit of humor apparently failed. So I started to think about how I might handle this at an actual seminar and then I realized I had.

It was at a SQL Saturday a number of years ago. It was a good topic, though, for reasons unknown to me, the presenter has not, to my knowledge presented again. And then there was the raised hand. It was someone I knew. And, he had more of a question than a comment. Then again about 10 minutes later. And I think probably a 3rd time. Now, he was in now way being mean or malicious. Heck, I think no matter how hard you looked, you’d never find a mean bone in him. He’s genuinely a decent guy.

But, and this is what I think we all need to do, after the talk, I pulled him aside and pointed out what he had done. He as embarrassed and apologetic. And he vowed to do better.

And as I write that, I realize, this happened TO me. See, I said I wasn’t perfect and I had failed. This time it was on Twitter. I typed a reply that I meant to be supportive and add a touch of humor. A friend DM’d me, “Really?” At first I was confused, but when I asked for her to expand, she pointed out what I had done. Yes, I had meant well, but sometimes intentions are less important than results or even perceptions. I decided to delete my comment, despite her saying it wasn’t necessary. I realized I had not contributed to the discussion and my comment could be a distraction that wasn’t needed. And since them I’ve tried to be better. But a comment she said stood out to me. She DMd me because she thought I was one of the “good ones” that I’d listen and accept feedback. That meant a lot to me. She could have ignored my comment and let me continue to be a jerk at times, or she could have publicly called me out and humiliated me, which might made her point publicly, but caused me to be hurt and not grow. She took the time. I appreciate that.

However, yesterday’s Twitter thread reminded me that all too often in situations like this, women and other minority (in that environment) group end up doing the emotional labor of trying to keep the discussion from recentering the discussion the “I have more of a comment than reply” crow.

Therefore, I think often the onus needs to be on us men to call out our fellow men to say, “hey, that’s not cool” or “do you realize how you came across there? I know you didn’t mean that.” We can’t rely on women and other minority groups to do all the emotional labor. So if you see someone trying to talk over a speaker, pull them aside. If you hear them make an off-color comment in a meeting, speak up. Call out behavior. Find a method that works for you.

I prefer, but am not always good about doing it, calling our behavior a bit more publicly. Not necessarily to embarrass the commenter, but to hopefully get them to correct their behavior and so that the original speaker knows they have support.

For example, if someone in a meeting makes a comment about “yeah, let the girls over in accounting handle it”, unless this is an accounting class for teenagers at an all-girls school, you can and should say “Umm, you mean the women right?”

You don’t have to humiliate a person to make the point. In most cases, the person doing it may not be aware and simply needs a nudge. Give them that chance like I was given. Now, in the end, there will be a few folks that do need to be simply called out and made an example of. I’m ok with that, but for the vast majority let’s work to give them the nudge.